Thank You

2k13blogger:

does anyone have like ten thousand dollars they don’t want

miucciapet:

android commercial: *proves that they’re better than iphones in every way possible*

me: …and?

luxvriously:

My anaconda will consider it

im so chill im practically dead

provokatives:

when you have two groups of friends doing different things friday night and you’re not invited to either one lol

Britain: Excuse Me
Netherlands: Excuseer me
Mexico: Perdon
Italy: Permesso
France: Pardon
Canada: Sorry
America: Get the fuck out of my way douchedick
Australia: Move cunt or I'll run you down with my kangaroo

dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

What doesn’t kill you gives you EXP.
(via running-in-a-storm)

lucithor:

being gay before the invention of lube must have been a pain in the ass